I don't have a lot of friends. I'm the type of person that has only a few people that I'm very close to, most of whom are family. I think its safe to say that the people who are close to me, and even those who are on the outer edge of my circle of important people, know that they can count on me to be there for them whenever they need me. I will help you and support you and do anything in my power to do so.
So, why is it that I am always an after-thought?
Brother's wedding? I was the M.C., and I didn't receive my duties until less than 18 hours prior to the ceremony. Guess what I was doing instead of sleeping the night before the big day? Prepping and setting up my stuff for the wedding and for the kids to participate in the wedding.
Wedding shower? I offered to help. Was told emphatically NO, my help was not needed. Then Sister-In-Law's sister (MOH) calls me 2 weeks before the shower and asks me to go shopping with her. We're shopping and I find out by accident that yes, I am indeed helping with hosting the shower and this is how much money I need to pitch in. Right now. I was totally unprepared!
Baby shower? I contacted S-I-L's sister 6 months before baby's due date to let her know I wanted to help with the shower. I heard nothing from her until 4 months later, when I contacted her again, wondering what I could do to help. Again, I was told that NO, my help was not needed. He's my nephew too!
Nephew's Baptism? I offered my services as Godparent. We go to the same church and I watch him 30-40 hours per week. I found out the day before the baptism that Sister-in-Law's sister had won out over me. Granted, I had figured out by that time that it wasn't me, but nobody had the courtesy to tell me, "No thanks. We've chosen XXXXX instead." It's not like they never see me! I guess I'm only good for changing dirty diapers. I even offered to help with the little gathering afterward. Nope, they didn't need any help, they were going to do it all themselves. I respect that, but why were the other sisters bringing food and helping with set-up?
Cousin's Wedding? I was chosen to be Bridesmaid #2 because Groom couldn't decide between his two closest friends to be his only attendant. He chose them both, and I got asked by default.
Play dates? My Sister-in-Law (not the above-mentioned) used to watch my children for me 3 days a week until Daughter #2 was born. My daughter #1 and her daughter #4 are VERY good friends and love to play together. SHE insisted that we get together once per week to let the girls play. After this week they will have gotten together 3 times in 24 weeks. Each time at my insistence and with my persistence.
Sleepovers? The same S-I-L's 4 kids came over in the summer to "camp" out in our backyard. B-I-L dropped the kids off. I offered to bring them home, but she insisted that it would be just as easy to make the trip out and pick them up. Now, with the play date this week, she wants to come pick up Daughter #1. Why is it OK for her to drive my kids, but not for me to drive hers?
Church Activities? I offered to help with a main position with Children's Church. They choose someone else to be at the helm every time its my turn to serve. Usually the person "in charge" is a newer member. I guess being a member for 18 years isn't long enough? I also signed up to sing in the choir several times. Each sign-up was ignored.
I don't know. Maybe I'm just whining. I'm just frustrated because I actually have some time now where I can pitch in and help and I keep getting overlooked. I guess the best I can do is to keep offering to help.
The worst they can say is no.
No comments:
Post a Comment